I’ve been struggled with how to word this post for a while now… but it’s something I feel needs to said, so I want to share it.
Dear Wedding Planners,
There’s a shift I’m beginning to see in our industry (and would like to see more of!) … a shift of sharing & caring, of compassion over competition, of friendships not rivalries.
When I first started I didn’t have a wedding-planner-mentor. A lot of how I operate DSE comes from the photography blogs I became so good at stalking:) I followed SO MANY phenomenal photographers, and would read their business related posts & apply them to our industry. I reached out to quite a few wedding planners when I first started (to introduce DSE & say “hello”), and I found that some were REALLY responsive…. and some weren’t. And that’s okay!! I knew being “new” would mean I would have to gain the trust of both potential clients & vendors, and prove that I knew what I was doing & could make this dream work.
What I wasn’t ready for, was the downright negativity and hatred I received. Did it happen a lot? No. But 3 emails is enough to make you gun-shy of ever wanting to email another planner. Hearing “You haven’t paid your dues” or “I learned through trial-and-error so you need to, too” was hard, friends. Do I agree that being a business owners means trial-and-error… YES!! Definitely!! But my mindset has always been one of SHARING not hiding … I want to share my error (and success!) with others, so that it can potentially keep you from making the same ugly mistakes I did!!
Because of how a select few treated me, I did the EXACT opposite when other planners or potential planners emailed me… I would share SO MUCH info!! I would (and still do!) try my hardest to encourage them, answer their questions & give them real-life examples of DSE experiences. My DSE One-On-Ones are an OPEN BOOK… we talk about anything and everything related to business/planning/styling/flowers/etc. and I LOVE my time with these ladies!!!
What I’m realizing now is that there’s a happy medium we need to find. A medium of sharing information, encouraging one another & mentoring each other… while also trusting that the person you share it with won’t just copy, but will find their own way.
I refuse to be like those boss ladies who emailed me months ago. I REFUSE to degrade, judge & lash out at other boss ladies doin’ their thing. I refuse to give up my passion for building LASTING community in this industry, and will strive to always encourage women who are dreaming big… but I’ll admit, I’ve been hurt recently by seeing work I so openly shared being borderline copied by another.
Be careful how you use the information shared to you, friends. Be careful that it’s done your OWN WAY… not a copycat of someone else’s. Whether it’s the wording on your website, the nickname for your business or the hashtag you use… don’t copy what others have worked hard for. We are in this TOGETHER… that means we RESPECT, VALUE and UNDERSTAND the work we’re each doing!! I want to encourage you to find your own way… make it unique & creative & YOU! Your business is not mine, and mine is not yours. Rather than borderline copying what others are doing, use the knowledge you receive as fuel to dig deeper, dream bigger & let your creative juices flow.
I want us all to continue to give & grow & learn TOGETHER… I want to see compassion, not competition. (In fact, this is so much of the heart behind Creative At Heart… we are ALL creatives at heart!!) Take the knowledge being given & use it to better your brand, your business and yourself… make it a clear representation of you & your brand… and then share freely the knowledge shared to you. We’re on the same team, ladies, and I want to encourage that love vs. the hate we sometimes receive. I’m so honored to be apart of this industry, and so excited to see what’s in the store of the next few years!
(( Image by Andrea Pesce Photography ))